Fanfic Rec: "Watching" (Brokeback Mountain)

[flowrs4ophelia]

"He was used to looking at men, not so used to wanting to, found himself dropping his mare back with Ennis up front, just to see that broad back with dust on the shoulders, the cropped dun hair almost curling at the neck, and every now and then a square, veined hand at the reins, the fingers rough and reddened, the hard hard life. Jack swallowed hard, choking on his supper, he and Ennis sitting nearly knee-to-knee by the fire, swallowed whiskey harder, scaring himself as he got drunker and drunker because he wanted to say things, not wanting to quit the warmth to go to the sheep, began thrashing around for any excuse to stay longer, watch closer. Ennis's little patch of fire in the night began to blaze somewhere inside Jack's ribs, a soft, quickening place surrounded by cold bone of years without."

This beautifully written ficlet explains perfectly what must have been going through Jack's head the whole time since he met Ennis until they had sex the first time and he had no idea what was going to come of it. Jack was obviously a lot more aware of his feelings from the beginning, and this writer does a really good job of describing how he would be so sick and crazy with wanting Ennis by the time they share the tent that he actually has the balls to make a move. Captures Jack's personality just right.

Title: Watching
Author: neuontz
Rating: R
Summary: "At first all Jack wanted was to watch."
Link: Those black-eyed susan eyes...

Also recommended by this author:
Untitled - A short and very sad poem expressing Ennis's feelings.